Tender: Cowlicky whorls in the hair of young boys and old men. Being pulled into a kitchen slow dance. A bashful niece sing-songing, “I love yoooou” and reaching to hold hands. Forlornly festive: Left-behind twinkle lights framing the window of a shuttered shop. Deflated Christmas decorations littered across a field like a massacre of plastic. … Continue reading Morsels for every moment
I. Hours later, even, I can smellthe chlorine on my skin.A sudden trace, the tanglike a lover’s familiar scent.Coming home to myself,only slightly late,every time. II. The brash internet reviewdeclares that NO ONE has liveduntil wiping with bamboo.That seems a little extreme —but who wouldn’t try to test it? In early plague daysof empty grocery … Continue reading Two small things, written in a parked car, served on a Wheat Thin to you.
+ + + + + + + + There will be a party where you’ll feel like nobody’s paying you attention. And there will be a party where attention’s all you’ll get. What you need to do is know how to talk to yourself between these parties. + + + + + + + + … Continue reading “How to be alone” by Pádraig Ó Tuama
Corner of Wheat Thin found in hair Young man in a straw hat riding handsless on a bicycle, singing a yodely tune at top volume Most impressed by kindness, athletes who let others finish ahead of them Georgia: Little Onion Daycare, business that is car wash + hair studio, signs nailed to trees with PEACHES … Continue reading Reminders I have texted to myself, contextless
Eating a hot, dripping honey butter biscuit from Whataburger while listening to a completely transcendent interview with Ocean Vuong. He and I are not the same species, I think, brushing greasy crumbs off the jeans I’ve worn for three days and crying at a story he tells about his mother. “Back to work” for the … Continue reading Recent incongruence
Am I more likely to practice my ukulele after putting giant googly eyes on it? How many Instagram workout videos can I watch without trying a single one? Can we patch holes in the ozone layer with white people’s defensiveness, including my own? {Seems pretty impenetrable at times.} How many bowls of cereal for dinner … Continue reading Unofficial experiments conducted in summer 2020
Among all the things that younger Julie might not have been able to imagine about life, at the top of the list would be living above the tops of trees. In pandemic times, I’ve spent more time than usual staring out windows: over thick forest, toward small mountains nearby, then the river. From my vantage … Continue reading On something like resilience
This is a 36 year-old white female: right-hand dominant with past medical history of anxiety, cervical pain/back pain/headaches, bilateral wrist fractures, cardiac arrhythmias, benign cyst removed from her face, wisdom tooth extraction, who presents on this day for re-evaluation. This is a tall drink of sweet tea who can also be salty: listens to the … Continue reading How I am summarized in my medical file, and other possible {but less medically useful} iterations
The deep set of a stranger’s teeth marks in my favorite foam dumbbell at the pool. The time a clinic assistant asked, “Are you an English teacher?”to which I excitedly responded, YES! thinking she sensed something about my soul, or maybe was a student on campus and recognized me from there. “How did you know?”She … Continue reading An incomplete list of random things interpreted as signs of love from the universe
OPTIONAL: Light lots of candles, and every time they don’t burn down your house smugly think, I AM THE MASTER OF FIRE. I AM THE MASTER OF MY DESTINY! Make space for both quiet and joyful noise. Breaking silence by humming or warbling with ridiculously exaggerated vibrato doesn’t fix a blessed thing — but it … Continue reading How to begin again, continued
